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Tuesday, February 22, 2011

A Deals A Deal

I think when people get married and they say the vow in sickness and in health they think of them as a couple, I don't think they think sickness and in health also means their parents/families sickness and health. I know when I said it I never thought about that. Well my sweet husband has lived up to his end of this vow this year.
When you get the call your mom is sick you feel so many feelings all at once.. It is like a wall that smacks you in the face a wall so hard you stop breathing. When I got the news last year I wanted only 3 things 1. for it to be untrue 2. to hug my mommy 3. to talk to my husband cuss he will make me feel better. I did get 2 out of the 3. My mom never shed a tear, she never thought anything negative or had any doubt that she would beat breast cancer AND SHE DID.. this was not a easy walk in the park for her or our fisherman and as one of her kids it was hard too.
I had up until that day never ever allowed myself to entertain the thought of not being able to call my mom ever single time I want to make Dawn chicken and find out if it is mayo or miracle whip or celebrate Christmas, thanksgiving, birthdays and girls weekends together. On that day as I drove home from work I cried harder then I have ever in my whole life and when I opened the door to my house and fell in Rob was there, he picked me up , he hugged me, he said nothing till the time was perfect. But mostly he allowed me to feel all I needed to and took care of the rest of our life so I could do what I needed. The night before my mom's operation he held my hand in bed knowing I was not going to sleep and hugged me for a long time the next morning before going to work. He always knows when to talk and when to hug. I was pregnant during all this so to say that I was stable on any day to start was far from the truth but this sure make me a giant ball of emotions. This weekend he again stepped up and stepped up big! He is the calm in this relationship and when I get a bit to far off course he always knows how to reel be back in. He knows when I have hit my wall and when I need a break he knows when I cry to let me, he knows that a hug to me is better then any words and he can make me laugh mid tear. Even in my darkest fear and my saddest day I have the best friend a girl could ever have standing beside me so those dark days have a bit of sun.

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